Tackle's out up Raphole Creek

The quiet waterways of Pranker’s Wycke seem an unlikely location for invasion. Yet, beneath our still waters, an interloper is lurking. The enemy is the armoured suckermouth catfish, an invasive North American species that has spread rapidly since first recorded in Raphole Creek less than a year ago.

“It’s extremely worrying,” said Ms Trish E Fench, president of the Wycke Angler’s Association. “The local fauna simply can’t compete with its voracious appetite and ability to stay on the bed no matter the force of the discharge. If we can’t control it, our traditional spawning grounds at Runkon Spring will be decimated.”

The unfamiliar habits of this new breed have so far thwarted the efforts of resident anglers.

“The main problem is the suckermouth seems to show no interest in our flies,” explained club secretary Grant Pope, who this time last year was happily organising his tackle for the coming season. “We’ve tried everything. Even Trish, who really knows how to dress the hook, hasn’t had any luck so far.”

“Despite the cold, some of our hardier male members have been out morning, noon and night, but without so much as a nibble,” added Ms Fench. “I went to join them yesterday after work, and the sight of them all standing hopefully with their rods in hand filled me with a strange mixture of pride and despair.”

However, all is not yet lost, and Trish is hopeful that if we, the residents of Pranker’s Wycke, pull together, we can be free of the suckermouth once more.

“It came to me in a flash last evening. Grant was fumbling around in my box for inspiration after another fruitless session up the Creek. Suddenly I realised - it wasn’t so much the bait as the technique that was lacking. Catching North American fish requires North American methods. Fortunately I remembered a recent visit to my old friend Vicky Stibrator in Kentucky. She had lost interest in rods some time ago, but achieved great success and satisfaction by skilful use of the hand. She quickly established herself as the local ‘dogging’ expert, as Kentuckians call the widespread practice of catching catfish using only one’s bare hands. (I understand it is called noodling or tickling elsewhere). Well, Grant was off like a flash after I told him, and had immediate success where Wyedmi Rife runs up the back of the overflow car park. I think this may be the taste of things to come.”

In order for dogging to really be successful, we need as many people as possible to get out into the fresh air and have a go. A sign-up sheet is in the townhall so do please get involved and let us know if you have any success catching a suckermouth.

Letters #1

Stand up, lest we be inconvenienced

Dear Residents

Firstly I must thank all of you who got behind my Brown Trout campaign. I regularly pinch a loaf from the bread bin and nip down to feed the fish! Last year’s significant release has really made Raphole Creek, the regeneration project and the crack-down on dumping, a local success story.

It is with positive expectations then that I ask you to join with me in a new movement, to prevent the closure of the public convenience in Hertinmer Square. Last week, the council stated that as part of plans to lay bigger cable, the public lavatory will need to be removed, with no provision to replace it.

When I need to drop the kids off in town or I’m doing a Brownie run, I find it reassuring to know there’s a place to go if I get caught short. Which facilities would office workers use in the event of an emergency evacuation? Where would customers of the Sleeping Wit spend a penny on the way home?

If we let this happen, what will close next? The post office or maybe the bank? Where then would we go to send a large brown package or make a liquid deposit?

We, the residents of Pranker’s Wycke, must not allow our concerns on the matter to be pooh-poohed. We must strain, such that our voices be heard. We should ready ourselves in case the council chooses to play dirty.

If you want to contribute to the “We won’t lose the loo!” campaign, please do get in touch.

Sheila Fitt-Cumming